Lesson Three: Structure & Outline
The easiest way to sabotage all the work you have done so far is to skip this lesson. Writing is as much a disc
ipline as it is an art, and to ensure that your essays flow well and make sense, you need to construct solid outlines before you write. Unless you conscientiously impose structure around your ideas, your essay will be rambling and ineffective. An outline should make sense on its own; the ideas should follow logically in the order that you list them. As you add content around these main points, these words should support and reinforce the logic of the outline. Finally, the outline should conclude with an insightful thought or image. Make sure that the rest of your outline reinforces this conclusion.
The body paragraphs should consist of events, experiences, and activities you have already organized in chronological order or in order of importance. In many of the essays that our editors read, the order of paragraphs seems to have been chosen at random. Make clear why one point follows another: each point in your outline should connect with the next; each main category should be linked to your introduction or thesis; and each sub-category should be linked to the main category. As you make your outline you should be able to see where there are holes in your essay.
Example Essay Structures
The following structures are demonstrated and discussed:
Example Structure
The Example Structure follows the rules of a traditional academic essay: begin with a main argument or thesis statement, follow this with three pieces of evidence that support the argument, and wrap up by stating what the essay has shown. This is a good structure to use when making a single, strong point. Its power lies in its simplicity. Because it allows you to present several points neatly in support of a single claim, it is especially useful for making a persuasive argument. This format will be most helpful when writing short essays, but for longer personal statements, it might appear formulaic and dull. One of the more creative structures described below might draw attention more successfully to your writing.
Compare and Contrast
For some questions, this structure is a natural choice, as in the personal growth and development question, which asks you to compare yourself now to the way you once were. You can structure a cause-and-effect essay point for point, by comparing one aspect of the object or situation at a time. Or you can choose to employ the block method by thoroughly covering all the points of the first object or situation in the first half of the essay and then comparing it with all the points of the other in the last half.
Narrative or Chronological Structure
If you have decided to focus on a single event in your life, you will want to use this structure. It can be filled with action, dialogue, and subtle details. Although, you should not confuse effective drama with overwrought, Hollywood-style melodrama. The briefest and simplest of events can take on meaning when told convincingly. Using a chronological or narrative structure over a long period of time (anything more than a day or two) can often read like a ship's log. You don't want to sound like you're rattling off a schedule of events. Rather, take on the role of storyteller and provide great detail about a very specific set of events. The sequence of events will help reinforce flow from one stage of the essay to the next and will make the difficult task of transitioning between paragraphs very natural. While the narrative is one of the most effective forms of writing for an essay, it can also be difficult. Use the following tips as your write your narrative:
Make the reader aware of chronology and keep the story generally moving forward.
Don't feel obligated to tell more of the story than you need to convey your point. Extra details distract from the main drive of the story.
Try not to use reflective conclusions or introductions describing what you learned; start and end with the action and have everything take place within the context of the story.
Describe events, people, and places in very specific, colorful terms.
Narrative can be combined with other structures for an approach that is less risky but still interesting. Beginning an essay with a brief story is the most common and effective of such methods. Another twist on the narrative essay is one that describes a single place, person, or action in great detail. It appeals to the senses of the audience without necessarily drawing on the action of a story. There is no standard structure found in this type of essay -- each is differently organized -- but all rely on crisp imagery and sensory detail, leaving the reader with a single, vivid image. Single images are easier to remember than a list of points, qualities, traits, or qualifications, no matter how impressive any one or all of them may be. Still, this is a risky approach and is best employed when you have to provide multiple essays for one school so that you have a chance to structure your other essays more traditionally.
Descriptive Structure
This is similar to the chronological structure except that instead of walking step by step through increments of time, it follows step by step through a description of a place, person, or thing. The first paragraph gives an introduction describing the general feel of the place, person, or thing. The body paragraphs offer in-depth descriptions of two or three particular aspects of the place, person, or thing. In the last paragraph, the writer steps out of the descriptive mode and offers a brief conclusion of what the place, person, or thing says about him or her.
Cause-and-Effect Structure
Often times you will be asked for a life-changing experience or about someone or something that has had a great influence on you. This structure shows that you understand and appreciate the effect that other entities have had on your development and maturity. For these essays, you will want to use the body paragraphs to first describe the influence and then move onto how that has had an effect on you. You can either divide the essay into a "cause section- and an-effect section"or you can mesh the two together by taking each small description one by one and explaining the effect it has had on you. If you decide to use this structure, be sure that you don't write yourself out of the equation; make the point that you were the catalyst between the cause and the effect. That way, you demonstrate that you know how to take action and create change.
Sample Outline and Essay
Below you will find a sample outline and the essay written from that outline.
OUTLINE
Paragraph 1 (Introduction)
I. Leading sentence: “It took me eighteen years to realize what an extraordinary influence my mother has been on my life.”
II. Summary of main points: “I not only came to love the excitement of learning simply for the sake of knowing something new, but I also came to understand the idea of giving back to the community in exchange for a new sense of life, love, and spirit.”
Paragraph 2 (First Supporting Point)
I. Transition sentence: “My mother’s enthusiasm for learning is most apparent in travel.”
II. Supporting point: Her mother’s enthusiasm for learning.
III. Evidence: Learning through travel by using the example of a trip to Greece.
Paragraph 3 (Second Supporting Point)
I. Transition sentence: “While I treasure the various worlds my mother has opened to me abroad, my life has been equally transformed by what she has shown me just two miles from my house.”
II. Supporting point: Her mother’s dedication to the community.
III. Evidence: Her multiple volunteer activities such as helping at the local soup kitchen.
Paragraph 4 (Conclusion)
I. Transition sentence: “Everything that my mother has ever done has been overshadowed by the thought behind it.”
II. Reiteration of main points: “She has enriched my life with her passion for learning, and changed it with her devotion to humanity.”
III. Taking it one step further: “Next year, I will find a new home miles away. However, my mother will always be by my side.”
Click here to create your own outline
COMPLETED ESSAY.
It took me eighteen years to realize what an extraordinary influence my mother has been on my life. She’s the kind of person who has thoughtful discussions about which artist she would most want to have her portrait painted by (Sargent), the kind of mother who always has time for her four children, and the kind of community leader who has a seat on the board of every major project to assist Washington’s impoverished citizens. Growing up with such a strong role model, I developed many of her enthusiasms. I not only came to love the excitement of learning simply for the sake of knowing something new, but I also came to understand the idea of giving back to the community in exchange for a new sense of life, love, and spirit.
My mother’s enthusiasm for learning is most apparent in travel. I was nine years old when my family visited Greece. Every night for three weeks before the trip, my older brother Peter and I sat with my mother on her bed reading Greek myths and taking notes on the Greek Gods. Despite the fact that we were traveling with fourteen-month-old twins, we managed to be at each ruin when the site opened at sunrise. I vividly remember standing in an empty amphitheatre pretending to be an ancient tragedian, picking out my favorite sculpture in the Acropolis museum, and inserting our family into modified tales of the battle at Troy. Eight years and half a dozen passport stamps later I have come to value what I have learned on these journeys about global history, politics and culture, as well as my family and myself.
While I treasure the various worlds my mother has opened to me abroad, my life has been equally transformed by what she has shown me just two miles from my house. As a ten year old, I often accompanied my mother to (name deleted), a local soup kitchen and children’s center. While she attended meetings, I helped with the Summer Program by chasing children around the building and performing magic tricks. Having finally perfected the “floating paintbrush” trick, I began work as a full time volunteer with the five and six year old children last June. It is here that I met Jane Doe, an exceptionally strong girl with a vigor that is contagious. At the end of the summer, I decided to continue my work at (name deleted) as Jane’s tutor. Although the position is often difficult, the personal rewards are beyond articulation. In the seven years since I first walked through the doors of (name deleted), I have learned not only the idea of giving to others, but also of deriving from them a sense of spirit.
Everything that my mother has ever done has been overshadowed by the thought behind it. While the raw experiences I have had at home and abroad have been spectacular, I have learned to truly value them by watching my mother. She has enriched my life with her passion for learning, and changed it with her devotion to humanity. In her endless love of everything and everyone she is touched by, I have seen a hope and life that is truly exceptional. Next year, I will find a new home miles away. However, my mother will always be by my side.
Outline Worksheet
I. Introduction
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II. Body
A. Paragraph 1:
1. Supporting Point #1
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2. Evidence for Supporting Point #1: analysis of example to show how it supports the topic sentence and thesis ____________________________________________________
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B. Paragraph 2:
1. Supporting Point #2
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2. Evidence for Supporting Point #2
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C. Paragraph 3:
1. Supporting Point#3
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2. Evidence for Supporting Point #3
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III. Conclusion
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Essay Templates
Writing admissions essays is not formulaic; the best essays will have the most personal detail and passionate writing. However, if you are suffering from severe writer's block and need help piecing together an effective essay, we have provided generic templates for the most common types of essays. If you stick strictly to these templates, you will end up with pretty awful essays; they are solely intended to jumpstart your writing in its earliest stages.
Warning: If you rely heavily on these templates in your final draft, you will write one of the worst admissions essays possible. Use these templates only to get your own creative juices flowing.
Describe An Influential Person
The person who has had the biggest influence in my life is _______. Because ______ was __________ he/she taught me __________ but also much about __________. I have been close to _______ ever since I was _____ years old and we ______. I feel a debt of gratitude to ________ for always being there for me through _________.
__________ has always been my role model. I have long admired his/her success in ________, _________, __________, and the way he/she ________. My goal in life is to be just like him/her, to get the most I can out of life. Because of ______ strong influence, I find _________ fascinating. I am always impressed that he/she started __________ at my age and rose to be ____________ in just a few years. _______ has supported my interest in ________, and was very proud of me when I __________.
I also admire __________'s devotion to ____________. This was ___________ and quickly became _____________. This endeavor took up his/her life for ______________ until he/she _____________ in __________. Since then, ______________ has _____________ in part because of ___________'s efforts.
____________'s accomplishments have meant _________to me. __________ has been ___________ in my life, showing me that ___________ and ___________. I hope to inherit his/her virtues and _____________ in order to make him/her proud.
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Discuss an Activity Outside of the Classroom
________ has been a crucial part of my life ever since ________. Back in _________ when I started ___________ I never imagined that __________. _________ used to encourage me/cheer me on/drive me back and forth as I practiced/continued to __________. During this time I met ___________, learned ____________, and became better at ______________.
The best part of ____________ is _________________ because ____________. Doing ____________ means __________. The __________ team/group/club/organization introduced me to __________. For most of my peers in _______, the goal was ____________. But for me, my main objective was ____________. I will never forget the time when I/we __________. This team/organization gave me the opportunity to _________ and learn ___________, which has benefited me in ___________.
In addition to the fun/competition/other, ___________ has confronted me with many challenges. I am not naturally a good ___________. I am not ______, _________, or _________. However, I discovered that in order to excel at ___________, I needed to ________. As a result, I am known on my team/organization as _________. Each day, I become stronger at ________ and _________.
Whether I continue _______ or not, I know that I have already built strong __________ and skills in ___________. My experiences with ___________ have taught me lessons that I can apply beyond ___________, and I will always have __________ for years to come.
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Discuss an Issue of Importance
During the last __________ years, I have devoted a significant amount of time to ___________, an issue that is often _______________ because of ___________. In my quest to ____________, I faced many obstacles of my own such as ______________. But after _____________, I realized that I could _________________ and ______________.
One reason why this issue is so ________ is that ___________. Most people do not realize that _____________. Moreover, those who find themselves ___________ do not have ________________. With ___________ and ____________ people who/a society that is _____________ has little chance to ___________.
In this difficult ___________, I realized there were many _________________ who needed my ______________. By _______________, I helped ___________ to _____________. Finally, in ___________, I reached a turning point when I ____________ with ______________ at _____________. At this time, I had the opportunity to _______________. I helped with _____________ and ___________. I realized that in order to _______________, I had to _______________ and ______________. I started by ____________ and ____________, which had the affect of _____________ and ________________.
Since this time in _____________, I/we have accomplished/managed to/seen ____________. Many problems remain, such as ____________ and ______________. But with ____________ in mind, I know/our organization is prepared to/our society can ________________. My interest in __________ has taught me that I am __________, that my group is ___________, and that society/our culture is _______________. In the future, I would like to continue ____________ for the sake of ______________ and hope to incorporate ___________ into my time at ____________.
